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Wisdom Wednesday: Don’t Build Your House First!

"Before you marry, have a house to live in, fields to till, and vines to cut."  —Spanish proverb

“Before you marry, have a house to live in, fields to till, and vines to cut.” —Spanish proverb

Have you ever considered the wisdom of some things that seem old-fashioned? Although the concept of young men preparing themselves to support a wife and family can be found and is encouraged among the homeschool community, long before they even start dating, so many young people, especially outside of the homeschooling community struggle financially after being newly married, because they were not really prepared. I have been to many bridal showers at which the bride-to-be has confessed to not even knowing how to cook. It is time to recall and revive some old-fashioned things.

When I first read Proverbs 24:27, I thought, “What?? Don’t you need a house to live in, to come home to after working in the field? Why would you prepare your fields first and then build your house?”

Ok, so I’m a little slow sometimes.

There was a time when young people learned life skills and saved money while living with their parents, so they would be ready to raise a family of their own. Young men sought to have a good job and a place of their own before they would even consider proposing marriage. Although the economy has forced kids to move back in with parents after having been on their own for a time, this generation seems to be more concerned with having fun in college and becoming independent than in preparing to become parents themselves. In fact, some shows portray having children as a negative thing, a fun and freedom stealer rather than the many joys and blessings children can bring. The word house in ancient times was also used to mean ‘family’, so the principle of preparing your fields, i.e. getting a job and being established before building your house, can apply to both your literal house and your family.

“In life, those who think about the future tend to do better than those who think only in the present. Yet those who think only in the present still do much better than those who think only in the past.” —Joe Beam

“The one who is not prepared today will be less prepared tomorrow.” —Latin proverb

The #1 reason for strife in marriages is money, although it generally isn’t the root cause but a symptom of something deeper. Men need respect and women need to feel secure and loved. Just think how much that reason can be diminished when young men are better prepared to support a wife and family financially and emotionally. I’m not saying women shouldn’t work, too, but ask any man, and even if they are failing to provide, they still feel that weight of responsibility.

“The better prepared, the more secure.” —Latin proverb

“Before you marry, have a house to live in, fields to till, and vines to cut.” —Spanish proverb

“An empty purse and a finished house, make a man wise, but too late.” —Portuguese proverb

“Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together.” —Vincent Van Gogh

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.” —Karen Lamb


If you liked this, you might also like… Making Plans


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